Problemo
I put jeans on for the first time in about six weeks yesterday and it’s confirmed, I’ve definitely gained weight. After many mixed emotions I am generally happy about this because I am feeling so much stronger. I generally feel the best I have in two years.
I think I may have put on about seven pounds. I am almost 110. My body feels different and you can’t see my bones in my chest or ribs so easily anymore. I would like to continue on this road and maintain a healthy weight except for a major problem… anatomically my body doesn’t like the weight.
I am extremely uncomfortable. One of the wires of my pacemaker is hitting a nerve on my diaphragm. I constantly have hiccups after eating (when my stomach expands), and no matter if I walk or sit down I can feel the electrical impulse on my left side. This, in turn makes me a nervous wreck at all times. I hate feeling the pacemaker working. I hate being constantly reminded that my heart is being pumped. It makes me think of my heart constantly and I cannot ignore it. I am nervous to eat.
So what am I to do? Lose weight and be comfortable yet weak and “too thin”? Or just deal with this as the docs tell me I may have to (since it isn’t dangerous they generally do not suggest going in to move the wire).
This combined with the fact that I haven’t been on my “diet” (eating green and clean) has me super anxious. It’s been easy to ignore it since I’ve been away from my routine but this all has the potential to get really complex in a few weeks. What to do?
4 months ago • 0 notes